The Difference Between Peer Pressure and Peer Influence
Peer influence is when teens choose to do something they wouldn’t otherwise do because they want to feel accepted and valued by their friends. It isn’t just or always about doing something against your will.
Peer influence refers to actions that empower your child to be influenced positively, making their life better. In contrast, peer pressure can be defined as actions that the child does not want to do, but feels compelled to do out of a desire to belong.
Although the term “peer pressure” is commonly used, “peer influence” is a more accurate way to describe how teenagers’ behavior is shaped by the need to feel part of a social group.
Positive and Negative Peer Influence
Peer pressure and influence can have both positive and negative impacts:
Positive Peer Influence
- Your child might be influenced to become more assertive
- They may try new activities and get more involved in school
- Peers can inspire healthier lifestyle choices
Negative Peer Influence
- Teenagers might choose to engage in behaviors they normally wouldn’t, like smoking or antisocial acts
- Negative peer influence can lead to adopting unhealthy habits
Types of Peer Pressure and Influence
There are several forms that peer pressure and influence can take:
1. Spoken Peer Pressure
Individuals or groups directly asking someone to participate in certain behaviors.
2. Unspoken Peer Pressure
Being exposed to behaviors, trends or choices of others, feeling pressure to conform.
3. Direct Peer Pressure
Specific behavior-based conformity, whether spoken or unspoken.
4. Indirect Peer Pressure
Less invasive, but can still validate behaviors the person wants to try.
5. Positive Peer Pressure
Pressure that yields positive results and healthier lifestyle choices.
6. Negative Peer Pressure
Pressure that challenges individuals to engage in unhealthy behaviors.
Signs Your Teen May Be Experiencing Peer Pressure or Influence
- Adopting new habits, both positive and negative
- Imitating their friends’ habits and lifestyle
- Sudden rebelliousness or apathy about things they used to care about
- Changes in tone and communication style
- Increased secretiveness
Strategies for Dealing with Peer Pressure and Influence
Recognize Unhealthy Dynamics
- Monitor your child’s friendships, both in-person and online
- Intervene if you notice unusual behavior or avoidance of eye contact
- Teach self-restraint before building self-confidence
- Involve teachers to help boost your child’s confidence and evaluate friendships
Set Boundaries and Say No
- Avoid peers who encourage dangerous behaviors
- Spend time with friends who resist negative peer pressure
- Know how to firmly say “no” to inappropriate situations
- Encourage open communication with trusted adults
Empower Your Teen
- Help them find friends who respect each other’s boundaries
- Teach assertiveness to resist inappropriate situations
- Discuss concerns with your child before issues escalate
Remember, positive peer influence can have a powerful, beneficial impact on your child’s development. By understanding and addressing both the positive and negative forms, you can help guide your teen towards healthy peer relationships and decision-making.